FAT GUY GOES NUTZOID (1983).
Lloyd Kaufman and Michael Herz strike again with this stinkwad of a film, which Troma scraped off the Men's Room floor and decided to distribute. It's as bad as you can imagine. Maybe worse. John Golden directed and let's hope somebody blinds him with hot pokers before he gets the chance to pick up another movie camera... Tibor Feldman stars as Roger, a scuzzy ex-con who can't take the 9-to-5 working world, so he grabs his geeky pal, Hugo, who's a counsellor at a summer camp for retarded adults, and they hit the road. Little do they realise, a non-verbal tub o' lard with a scruffy mohawk (Peter Linari) has hidden in the back of Hugo and Rog's truck. Imagine Lenny from Of Mice and Men as interpreted by King Kong Bundy, and you've pretty well summed up the depth of Linari's performance... Most of this snoozer chronicles their cross-country adventures with this idiot (whom they nickname 'The Mooka') in tow: Vomiting in fancy eateries, going spastic at a punk club, spilling food, and breaking up a wedding ceremony. This flick's idea of Pinteresque wit is to have this pathetic retarded man fart uncontrollably. Hey, I'm the first guy to laugh at Bad Taste, but not when it's so depressingly inane (not to mention tame). It's like being trapped in a stalled elevator full of Lyndon LaRouche impersonators -- ALL the characters are utterly intolerable... and the ending is just a hunk of sentimental clap-trap, when Roger helps The Mooka escape from a hospital psycho ward, since down deep the Fat Guy is just a slow-witted ball of fun. Gimme a fuckin' break!... The storyline has more holes in it than Jimmy Hoffa, and it's a total embarrassment, both technically and conceptually. If Troma paid more than a case of Thunderbird for it, then they were ripped off. Worse than SURF NAZIS MUST DIE! Worse than your grandparents' home movies! Better than The Love Boat (but then again, so's rectal cancer). No violence, gore, sex, foul language, or cheap laffs, and worst of all, it'd probably get a G-rating, except for the fact you see a guy's naked butt for 10 seconds... Oh, fuck it -- I don't even want to talk about this thing any more. Next!
© 1989 by Steven Puchalski.